A letter to.....dad?

I started to write to my father the other day, I began writing and could not stop and what was originally a letter turned into some sort of realization.
How much do we really have control over? How much do we really know about someone? The answer is that we only know what we see and what we have heard. In my particular case, I was forced into a new world(Jackson, Michigan), not know of what events that took place to get me there, innocent to the world ahead, and until recently I have never given much thought into this genre of deep thinking.
So… To my father, I do not know of what events that have transpired between you and my mother, but all I know is that it’s irrelevant, but what isn’t is the fact that we have finally found one another. Since the initial days of partum, I always wondered who my father is; was he kind, was he funny, caring, loving, all the attributes that a star father would have, or would he obtain the qualities that my mother so blatantly placed; rude, harsh, a liar and cheater, such attributes I would not find good at all, or was this a preemptive strike in order to wean my indulgence of my search for my father. It’s all here say, it does not matter, but what matters is the relationship I can finally start with my father.
There so many questions I have, so much time lost never again can be retrieved, except for the random reminiscent image. So with that said, every moment hence forth is crucial, laughs, love, the occasional emotional conversation, the trips to the bar, father son bonding moments I need to fulfill some sort of void I have within my soul.
Ready? 23 years have gone by with only unanswered whispers lost to the wind, prayers felt unworthy of attention but until now, when the time is right. How does one pick up the shattered remains of a lost dream, how can you glue back the fabrics of someone’s hopes, you can’t……….. The damage is done, and it is time to write a new chapter in the book of life.
Is there anything to regret? Maybe the results, and some of the affects it may have such as the ripples run across time and space, but in all honesty to regret would mean to undo, and without our experiences to guide us into the future we will learn nothing.
What we learn from life, what we experience, our environment and the way we adapt, has a great influence on who we become. The saying, “Nature VS. Nurture”, should really say, “Nature along with Nurture”.
In the end, only one thing is certain and that is death. The meaning of life will remain unanswered but only because we feel that the answer needs to be some sort of philosophical revelation guiding us all to a pre-determined destiny, I don’t feel that at all. I feel that the meaning of life is just that, to give our life meaning.
How we spend our days here matters most, you never know when your number is up. Create long lasting relationships, care unto others as if they were you, and don’t scorn others for their beliefs. The result of mankind is solely affected by mankind’s choices in its people. We are all the same really, and it is our soul that thrives in this world, and it is up to you to have made it worth it.